Monthly Archives: October 2020

Understanding Our Emotional Links With Others


There is an invisible link between everyone we have an emotional connection with. This is such a wonderful thing – especially these days, as more than ever we are drawing on established links with our friends and loved ones so that we can stay connected in this time of forced alienation. Our emotions have a drawing power. Our thoughts have a drawing power. They both draw others to us emotionally. The closer we are to another emotionally, the stronger the link. The more we engage emotionally with someone, sharing our thoughts, feelings, and the ins and outs of our life, the more we anchor in that emotional connection. And as we continue to share with one another in the upcoming months, we will further strengthen our emotional links. We don’t necessarily have to engage with another to strengthen our connection to them. Going over past events or emotional experiences with them in our mind – be they good or bad, strengthens our emotional link to the other. So does simply thinking about them. Depending on what we are thinking about and the health of the relationship, this may be good for us, or emotionally bad for us. They may feel it, or they may not. Below is a little practice "Cutting an Emotional Link with Another" to use if we are having trouble doing so on our own. This blog article is based on my books - published and upc0ming  Your Journey to Peace ... (2016) Why We Are the Way We Are (2018) Overcoming: Anger, Frustrations,  Hurt Feelings, ,Neediness, Blaming Others for Our Unhappiness (Dec 2020) Relationships in an Evolving World (March 2020) About My Books here    To stay Updated, Sign-up for my Newsletter  here The stronger the emotional link is between two people the more easily we can draw the other in and affect them emotionally. How this all plays out depends on our innate natures, our attitudes, and how we view and navigate life. Some people are emotional by nature: they live through their feelings, and easily express them. They can sometimes pick up on others feelings and emotions. Others are less emotional: they may feel, but do not express their emotions easily or regularly. They are less likely to pick up on others feelings or emotions. Some of us thrive on closeness: we need to share our feelings, emotions, and what is happening in our life with those close to us. Others of us keep things to our self: we have no need to share our inner world with others, nor do we feel the need to tell others what is going on in our life. Many people are positive and light-hearted: they feel positive, their outlook on life is light and positive, they aim to feel good - and they make those around them feel good. Others are stuck in negativity they are heavy-hearted: they have a negative and/or dark outlook on life and issues, may regularly focus on the dramas of life, and making [...]

Understanding Our Emotional Links With Others2020-11-11T13:47:09+00:00

The Cavern Between You and Others: Direct Relationship Between You and You – 2/3


It is our unconscious influences that affect our connection to our True Self. They created our attitudes and behaviors, which developed in response to how we experienced or perceived life from within our familial and cultural backgrounds – with our internalizing of these experiences highly influenced by our innate personalities. See Here for Part 1  This is why people brought up in the same household can be so different in their outlook and approach to life. If the influences we internalized instilled confidence, hope, positivity, autonomy, and lightness into our being, our connection to our True Self would remain strong. However, if we unknowingly allowed these influences to cause us to become negative, pessimistic, or needy, to have low-self esteem or feel that life is heavy and a struggle, our connection to our True Self becomes weakened. When we internalized our past influences as generally positive, we are able to navigate life without much difficulty or conflict. We can attain what we want in life because we feel empowered, as the connection to our power-base has remained strong. When our past influences cause us to view and respond to life negatively, we may act in counterproductive ways that undermine our efforts and that create conflict with others. This article is based on my books, “Your Journey to Peace … ” and “Why We Are the Way We Are” both available in print and e-book from Amazon. Cover Images and Links to About Below. This makes our life seem difficult and what we want in life hard to achieve because we feel disempowered: our connection is weak. This disconnect creates a cavern between “us and us” as our power-base lies in our connection to our True Self.  It is where we find the strength and integrity to become our Best Self, and the fortitude to keep it. Below are some of the developed attitudes and behaviors that keep us disconnected from our power-base and True Self making life seem difficult and keeping us in conflict with others. NEEDINESS We often bring our emotional neediness into our relationships, but are unaware that we are expecting our partner, child, parent, or friend to answer those needs. When they do not, we are hurt, become upset, and conflict often ensues. Our need may be personal: to feel loved, appreciated, validated, or served hand and foot. They may be more general: to become wealthy, powerful, famous, achieve a great success, or have a big happy family. It is not that these desires always bring negative results to our life or relationships, as having goals and desires can be a good thing, but when they come from an unconscious need to fill a void or fulfill and unmet past need, they hold an insatiable element. We become self-centered as this need is most often at the forefront of our thoughts and actions and it takes precedence over any consideration for the desires or needs of those around us. We also become defensive of our efforts to [...]

The Cavern Between You and Others: Direct Relationship Between You and You – 2/32021-03-18T19:00:24+00:00

Newsletter, Sept 2020, Allowing for Openness and Feelings of Vulnerability


Being emotionally open and allowing for feelings of vulnerability engages our soul. When we are emotionally open – whether in our thinking, speaking, or how we approach life and the issues and situations that crop up, we engage the power of our soul giving us access to the wisdom, ideas, and insights it holds. When we acknowledge our vulnerabilities, we create a space for our anxieties and fears to express themselves. This allows us to dispel any false ones, and effectively deal with those that are real. It is emotionally healthy for us to be open and to acknowledge our vulnerabilities. And although many of us are not  naturally open, and/or are afraid to face our vulnerabilities, the ramifications of Covid is giving the perfect opportunity to do so. The society we have grown up in has been based on power and strength. To get by and survive we have had to be powerful and strong – or at least appear to be. Any show of weakness, physical or emotional, was taken advantage of. To survive we learned to be closed, and to hide our vulnerabilities. It is time in our evolutionary journey for all of us to become emotionally open and to allow for feelings of vulnerability. And we can see this happening all around us as more and more people are calling out for equality and fairness in the world, and compassion for those going through hard times. My writing is based on my books, Your Journey to Peace ... and Why We Are the Way We Are. About my published - and upcoming books see here Below are links to Sign-up for this Newsletter, as well as for 2 companion posts: one that expands on these concepts, and a Worksheet to go along with it. The repercussions of the corona virus, with all the fear, stress, confusion, and conflict it has brought with it is the perfect vehicle to help individuals who are normally emotionally closed and do not allow for vulnerabilities to surface to do so. This time is giving us ample opportunities to be open – to live more from our heart-space and be more loving, understanding, and compassionate toward others who are also dealing with upheavals in their life. With so much pain and fear in the world, it is easier to shift away from the mind’s propensity to judge and criticize. And it is beneficial to do so. If our tendency has been to judge or criticize others, the feelings of vulnerability this time is bringing up offers us a wonderful opportunity to shift to being more loving, understanding, and compassionate. Most of us shy away from feeling vulnerable, but sitting in the uncomfortable feelings – for a short while, rather than denying them keeps our emotional bodies clear. Fear, anxiety, stress, change, uncertainty, and loneliness are now part of everyday life. Acknowledging how these really make us feel – how vulnerable we may feel, is far healthier than burying how we feel [...]

Newsletter, Sept 2020, Allowing for Openness and Feelings of Vulnerability2020-10-14T17:10:12+00:00


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