I Choose Me is the theme of my March 2022 Newsletter Message. Sign up to Receive or to Read Past Messages
To be happy, balanced, in control of our emotions, and feel empowered in life it is vital that we consciously choose what will support us maintaining – or bringing about – our sense of peace, happiness, contentment, balance, and empowerment.
Some of us almost always innately choose what will support our peace and happiness: We are adept at choosing ourselves.
Others of us fall into disempowering attitudes and behaviors amidst change, disappointment, or when life gets difficult, and we no longer choose what will support us being our best self. We allow outside forces to dictate our life.
There are many ways we can Choose Me. And there is more than one level of Choosing Me.
The is a Surface Level of “Choosing Me;”
There is also a More Subtle Level of “Choosing Me”
The Surface Level of “Choosing Me”
Most of us have now learned that to be happy and contented we must …
?Do what WE want in life – not what others or society decides is right for us.
?Say NO – when what others or society expects from us stresses or depletes us
?Align ourselves with positive and supportive people and uplifting activities so that we maintain or attain a positive mind frame
?Remove ourselves – from others who are negative or embrace drama that mess with our energy/vibration – and from situations out of our control that bring us down. ***
***(We can still act to help others, but to stay positive and light-hearted we must do so without blame, judgment, or drama).
This is an excerpt from my upcoming book, Overcome Your Unconscious Influences, such as Anger, Frustration, Hurt Feelings, and Blaming Others for Your Unhappiness (Book 2 of my ‘Our Journeys to Peace’ Series)
– due out Summer 2022. About My Books
And as well as my spiritual/personal development writing,
I also offer a variety of Writing Services
The More Subtle Level of “Choosing Me”
We all have days when a quick-fix-pick-me-up is just what the doctor ordered. Small indulgences like:
?Spoiling ourselves with that special desert
?Cozying up all day on the couch with a book
?Splurging on an extravagant meal
?Going on a shopping spree
? Binging a tv show
?Having an all-night gaming session
?Soaking leisurely in the bathtub
Spoiling ourselves just a little is often all we need to improve our mood when we have had a bad day or a disappointment. It is empowering.
Of course, turning to meditation, prayer – or any spiritual practice, talking to a loved one, or spending extra time in nature is the healthiest way to deal with unexpected disappointing events.
Still, spoiling ourselves – just a little is usually harmless and can be a simple pick-me-up.
Spoiling our self – giving our self a little love – when something unwanted has happened makes us feel good. Plus, it allows our unconscious to work in its subtle ways to heal the negative energy attached to whatever has happened.
And as long as this is a one-day (or very-short lived) indulgence, no harm is usually done to our overall well-being.
However, if we allow that quick-fix-pick-me-up to become an everyday thing or turn into a habit, it is no longer an act of loving our self.
Do not Allow the Soothing to Turn into Over-Indulging
When what we are doing to soothe our self turns into a habit and we over-indulgence in it we harm ourselves.
Soothing that turns into over-indulging may impact our health, and our finances, or we may start to ignore important people in our life or the things we need to tend to. And this all adds stress to our life.
Continuously soothing ourselves is an act of denial. Rather than deal with what has happened, we allow ourselves to fall into a “poor me” mind-frame. This causes us to become unbalanced. We may become apathetic. And apathy causes us to stay stuck.
The longer this goes on and the more often we rely on the feel-good-pick-me-up activity to ignore or forget about what happened, the more likely it will become an unhelpful, dysfunctional behavior.
In the throws of dysfunctional behaviors, we push away the effect it is having on our life. This further keeps us from dealing with the original situation head-on or looking for solutions.
The feel-good-pick-me-up activity will give us a good feeling in the moment, but when we over-indulge in anything there are always underlying feelings of guilt or shame because deep down we know we are not looking after our overall well-being. We are NOT Choosing Me.
When We Allow for Over-Indulgences, We Are NOT Choosing Me.
We Are Allowing Outside Forces to Dictate Our Life.
When something that was a quick-fix-pick-me-up turns into an over-indulgence it takes on a life of its own. Our brains get sucked into the excitement of it – but it is giving us a false sense of well-being because of our reliance on it to feel good or better.
Oh yes, and over-indulging can also become a full-blown addiction that we cannot control without professional help. So, nipping over-indulgences in the bud is vital to overall well-being.
When we are overindulging a thought usually arises in our mind “I should stop doing this” (it may also be a feeling of guilt or shame), but we are addicted to the high, so we cannot easily stop.
A Mantra to Help Us Stop Unhelpful Behaviors
It is always a challenge to stop behaviors that feel exciting, give us a high, or make us feel good. However, when if they are affecting our life and overall well-being, we must be proactive in overcoming their hold on us.
The words “I Choose Me” recently came to me when I was unable to turn off the tv one evening. I realized that even though I was enjoying the show it was late and that continuing to watch it would negatively impact me the next day.
I repeated “I Choose Me” over and over again in my mind and it brought me to the feeling of waking up feeling refreshed. This was a better feeling that the show was giving me.
“I Choose Me” has become my mantra for whenever I realize I could be doing – or thinking something more helpful to my overall health and well-being, and so …
I share my new mantra “I Choose Me” with you – to use at will??
Wishing you a blessed beginning of Spring,
© Rosemary McCarthy March 20th, 2022. Posted here April 22nd, 2022.
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