Better Dating Scenarios

Getting hurt feelings, being frustrated or confused, and becoming angry seem to be part of most of our dating experiences, as well as our short – and long-term relationships. Learning how to effectively deal with these goes a long way to improving our dating experiences and being happier in our relationships. (Although everyone is invited to read this post, I am currently working with women on their dating and relationship issues with men, and this post is aimed at those women. However, if you stumble upon it … welcome?. Much of this is basic, general, good advice for all types of relationships). Whenever we are disappointed, frustrated, or get hurt feelings because of what the other did – or didn’t do, our tendency as women is usually to either bury our feelings and turn them inwards, or, to react outwardly. Although these ways of dealing with hurts, disappointments, frustrations, etc. may feel good and appropriate in the moment, neither of them is effective at ultimately getting us what we want. This is because these types of responses are unnatural. They are simply automatic responses we developed at one time or another to deal with life and/or others to protect our hearts and hide or defend our true feelings. They do not come from a place of empowerment. This blog article is based on my published - and upcoming books  Your Journey to Peace ... (2016) Why We Are the Way We Are (2018) Overcoming: Anger, Neediness, Hurt Feelings, Frustrations, Blaming Others for Our Unhappiness  (Dec 2020) Relationships in an Evolving World (March 2021) About My Books here    To Stay Updated, Sign up for my Newsletter  here Whether we want our man to give us more attention, listen to us better, keep his word, or do more for us – more of what we expect, we must approach him in a way that encourages him to engage with us, listen to us – and hear us – not in a way that repels him, causing him to tune out, get his back up, pull away, get defensive, or even angry. To help in our dating and relationships, as women we must understand both how we deal with hurts, stressors, disappointments, etc. and how men deal with theirs. This empowers us! When stressed, hurt, disappointed, confused, angry etc., women usually turn to their emotions; men tend to withdraw. Understanding our self, and understanding the other in our dating or relationship scenarios is empowering. Being empowered is what ensures we are effective in ensuring that OUR goals in our dating and relationships are met. To Date Effectively:  We Must COME FROM A PLACE of Empowerment To Have/Create/Maintain Harmonious Relationships: We Must FEEL Empowered When we come from a place of empowerment and feel empowered, IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT THE OTHER SAYS OR DOES.  We know what we want/need to be happy and feel loved, and what will make us feel secure in our dating and our relationships. We act accordingly. Some of the ways [...]