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Harmonious Relationships

Show Your Vulnerability (True Feelings) Instead of Anger, Newsletter #54, Sept 2022

2023-01-12T00:59:01+00:00

This post is from my September 2022 Newsletter message.  Sign up or Read  my past messages. When we become frustrated, get hurt feelings, or another disappoints us, our default is often to react with anger or to lash out at the other in some way. And although we may feel some satisfaction at getting our frustrations out, reacting with anger, criticism, judgment, bullying – or any other aggressive way is counterproductive to giving us the ultimate results we are looking for. So is being passive-aggressive and burying our feelings. We all want to feel loved. And we all want to feel we matter to our loved ones. These are some of the many ways we feel the love and that our loved ones care about us. We all want to be understood, appreciated, listened to, and have our loved ones respect our wishes and do what they said they would do. When we feel frustrated or hurt and get angry at someone, one, some, or all of the above ways we might feel loved are not being met. However, rather than expressing how we truly feel in an attempt to get what we ultimately want, we lash out at the other. And often, we are not even in touch with our true feelings and have lost a connection to what we ultimately want. We are caught in a habitual pattern of reacting – and projecting our frustrations outward towards the other. Getting in Touch with Your True Feelings – and what You Ultimately Want For those of us not used to showing our true feelings – of being vulnerable, it is scary to step onto that ledge. Most of us who are used to hiding our true feelings, or no longer have a connection to them, have had our feelings trampled upon in the past to such a degree that we clammed up. We may have been bullied, belittled, shushed, or our feelings ignored. Maybe we were made to feel our feelings were unimportant or didn’t matter, or were told they were silly and childish when we expressed them. Physical or emotional abuse also makes our hearts close because our past experience tells us we cannot trust others and life. This is an excerpt from my upcoming book, Relationship Intelligence ... – due out later this winter. See My Published and Upcoming Books Whatever happened in our past to turn our heart cold will cause us to keep our feelings to ourselves. Past hurts may also have caused us to unconsciously bury our feelings so that we cannot tap into them enough to find the words to express them. We unconsciously created a barrier to our heart, and its feelings nature, to protect it from further pain. When protecting our hearts, our default is to project our pain outward towards the other with anger, criticism, blame, etc. – rather than reaching out from our hearts and showing our true feelings. We are afraid to be vulnerable by putting our hearts [...]

Show Your Vulnerability (True Feelings) Instead of Anger, Newsletter #54, Sept 20222023-01-12T00:59:01+00:00

What Would Love Do?

2022-08-01T02:25:50+00:00

What Would Love Do? is a concept I came across when studying A Course in Miracles. We can ask What Would Love Do? regarding ourselves, others, and situations. Our responses to what happens to us, to situations with others, or to issues that crop up are what dictate how we will feel once whatever is happening is past. 💚 If we come from a place of love – and express love’s qualities (understanding, compassion, etc., there is a link below to my post on Love's Qualities) we will feel better. Calmer. And we will be able to deal with anything that needs our attention with more clarity. We will get on our day feeling light. 💚 If we allow our mind to focus on the negativity of it all:  he/she did – didn’t do xyz, it’s not fair, or this should not have happened and anger or frustration take over, or we resort to judgment, blame, or revenge - or any type of aggression we will carry the dense energy of this with us throughout the day. We are only ever coming from a place of Love, or a place of Fear. Read my related post, the Qualities of Love / the Qualities of  Fear.  If we want to better ourselves - or to feel better, we must approach life differently than we were. In my past and before I started doing personal development work (I didn't even know that term). I just wanted to find peace in my life. A feeling had started to grow in me that there was something wrong with the picture of my life -  of how I was navigating life. That it was not others - but me - who were causing my unhappiness and frustrations.  Not me-me - but that somehow I was missing the mark. And so, my journey to peace (the name and themes of my books) began. Slowly, I began to realize that my frustrations and what I was feeling were not about the others - what they were or weren't doing. It was all coming from within me. I learned that my perceptions of others and situations were incorrect - and that I brought past hurts, feelings, biases, and beliefs into present situations.   From these echoes of the past and their beliefs and biases, I created protection mechanisms, and default ways of responding to life followed. I call these Our Unconscious Influences (see below for info on my upcoming book 2, Overcome Your Unconscious Influences ... in my "Our Journeys to Peace' Series). Based on what I experienced or witnessed when growing up, I started to understand that I projected my fears of what was or what might happen onto the present.  I allowed actions and innocent remarks to echo in my mind as proof that I would be criticized, wronged, stepped-on, and/or disempowered - just like my mother and many women of the 50's generation were. All my Articles / Blog Posts are based on my books. About My [...]

What Would Love Do?2022-08-01T02:25:50+00:00

What Readers Are Saying About “Your Journey to Peace”

2023-01-23T21:38:05+00:00

Below are a few reviews from readers of Your Journey to Peace, ... my 1st published book. (See below for my other published book, and my upcoming books on Personal Development and Relationships.  (I also offer a variety of Writing Services) You can also read What Spiritual Teachers Are Saying about Journey to Peace... and my writing in general. (Purchase links below) A Highly Insightful and Progressive Read! Anyone who wants to find healing in themselves and within their relationships should read this book. Rosemary offers great insight into the way our society is going and what we can do to move progressively forward as one collective humanity. (Rachel Greeve, Amazon Canada) About My other Published - and Upcoming Books (cover images at end) 💜💜💜 Highly Recommended for Anyone Striving for Personal Improvement and Higher Understanding! I found this book to be an urgent and timely read. The research is highly impressive, not to mention extremely provocative and informative. At the heart of this book is a spiritual plea for introspection, not only for each reader, but for a world in need of positive change. It is highly recommended for anyone striving for personal improvement and higher understanding. (Gary W Hesketh, Amazon, USA – author of The Soul of The Messenger). 💜💜💜 Insightful and Uplifting! I find this book offers insightful and well-thought advice/research and I recommend it to anyone on their spiritual journey to inner peace. (Anonymous, Amazon US and UK). 💜💜💜 About Your Journey to Peace  Purchase Links: Amazon    Barnes and Noble    Indigo/Chapters (Canada) About my other book, Why We Are the Way We Are,      My Upcoming Books, Relationship Intelligence - due out Winter 2022-23; Overcome Your Unconscious Influences - due out Spring 2023 💜💜💜 Rosemary💜🙏🏼🧡 ©Rosemary McCarthy, posted March 9, 2022 My Writing Services My Newsletter Sign Up       My Facebook page.    My Blog Page You can share this message as long as you include the whole post and include the copyright message and website below. 💜💜💜 Copyright ©Rosemary McCarthy, March 9, 2022.  All rights Reserved. To copy, share, or distribute this article simply ensure the content is copied in its entirety, is unaltered, and is distributed freely and for no monetary or personal gain, and that this copyright notice and the link for the article and the website www.spiritedfawnpublications.com are included. You can contact me at: rosemary@yourjourneytopeace.com. Blessings, and thank you kindly, Rosemary🌹🙏🏼 Published Upcoming in 2023

What Readers Are Saying About “Your Journey to Peace”2023-01-23T21:38:05+00:00

The Unfolding of Our Life Purpose

2022-02-15T05:10:07+00:00

From the highest perspective, our life purpose is to connect more fully to our True Self – to connect more fully to love. Connected to this love, we can feel love more deeply and can more easily express the Qualities of Love towards others and out into the world. Whether through a soul urging or we simply want to better ourselves, once we begin on our path to self-improvement we connect more fully to our True Self – and to the love it holds. We feel better, more peaceful, and become more empowered. We create more harmony around us. And our relationships improve. The Cavern between Us and Others Is in Direct Relationship  to the Cavern between Us and Our True Self  The path to bettering ourselves and becoming our Best Self is twofold” We must embrace what soothes and invigorates our soul – which allows the love within our hearts to grow. We must remove any blocks to the love that is held within our hearts. To soothe and invigorate our soul, we may start to meditate, do yoga, view, listen to, or partake in uplifting material, embrace what brings us joy, or spend time (or more time) in the comforting arms of nature, To remove the blocks to love, we must recognize, acknowledge, and address any Unconscious Influences that may be keeping us from accessing the love within. Connecting more deeply with love, we start to live life from a higher perspective. Our existence takes on more meaning, and our life purpose starts to unfold. Our ideas of how to live life start to shift. Being attuned to our True Self and keeping our minds open will allow us to hear what our soul is whispering to us and keep us open to new possibilities. And often, the path our life now takes and how our life purpose unfolds comes as a big surprise. Finding Our Life's Purposes Is Invigorating and Makes Us Feel Alive I spent most of my life having jobs to just get by or to keep myself sane from the perceived drudgery of being a housewife. As I moved along my journey to peace (the theme of all my writings) and started to let go of the Unconscious Influences that were holding me back from being my Best Self, my life purpose began to unfold. What I learned yearned for expression. And as I put pen to paper, words flowed out of me, and a new spark arose in me. Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine myself writing a book – especially one of a spiritual/self-help nature. My first book, Your Journey to Peace, Bridging the Gap Between Religion, Spirituality, Psychology, and Science, was born out of my personal journey to peace – and all I learned along the way While writing Your Journey to Peace …, I had periods of great excitement as I realized I could share what I have learned on my journey to peace – and possibly help [...]

The Unfolding of Our Life Purpose2022-02-15T05:10:07+00:00

Relationships: Partnering Up Consciously – Separating Consciously 2/3

2022-09-14T00:18:39+00:00

The more consciousness we bring to our dating, the better they turn out for us.  The more consciousness we bring to our current relationships, the more easily they flourish. And the more evolved and conscious we become - aware of our wants, needs, and expectations - as well as any ways of being that may be detracting us from getting what we want from our dating or relationships, the more confident and empowered we become. Being more conscious allows us to more easily trust our hearts - that they are showing us a true picture when choosing a spouse or life partner (or even friends or a business partner) - instead of one created from denial or neediness. Consciousness brings maturity to dating, and to relationships. Read Part 1     Part 3 The more evolved and conscious we become, the less we will have to be wary of our unconscious influences (hurt feelings, neediness, aggressive or overly-passive reactions, etc.) luring us into hurtful or chaotic situations. Nor will we have to be so vigilant at continuously examining our emotions, desires, or motives. Neither will we have to be so cautious of others’ motives. When we bring consciousness and the maturity it holds to our dating and relationships, we are be working at higher vibration capacities. Our radars become better attuned to the vibrations of others, and if something is off we will cue into it more easily. This article is based on  Ch 5, “Relationships” in my book, Your Journey to Peace …  and will be expanded upon in Relationship Intelligence;  Choose Your Ideal Partner, Improve Your Couple Relationship, Heal Your Family Relationships - Spring 2022.     About My Books  To stay updated, Sign-up for my free monthly publication 🔸 🔸 🔸 🔸🔸 My passion writing is in personal development, and spirituality genres, and   I am also a copywriter and offer various writing services to businesses and personal development and spiritual communities.  My Writing Services Page The more conscious we become, the greater our connection to our True Self, and the more we feel guided towards partners based on true soul pairings where both can thrive. Where there is equality, acceptance, and forgiveness - instead of confusion, hot then cold attitudes, jealousy, possessiveness, or flip-flopping about where the dating or relationship will go. In conscious relationships, we encourage each other to be the best we can be. And because our strength and self-confidence come from within, we are not invested in changing our partners or making them acquiesce to our desires. We also understand that our partner gets his or her strength and guidance from their True Self, and if that guidance is calling them to move on from the relationship we will not be so inclined towards drama, anger, revenge, or the plethora of negative responses breaking up has caused in the past. As we uncover and work through unconscious influences that affect how we think, react, and act, we will choose our partners, spouses, and life partners more consciously. We will become stronger in [...]

Relationships: Partnering Up Consciously – Separating Consciously 2/32022-09-14T00:18:39+00:00

Moving From “Its Not Ok” to “I’m at Peace With This” – Newsletter September 2021

2021-11-02T18:36:27+00:00

Our ultimate purpose is to return to love.*  And as we start to see others and life through the eyes of love, we can  … 🔸Overcome – and effectively deal with our issues and challenging situations 🔸No longer focus the differences we hold with others, 🔸Make peace with situations around us we disagree with. *A Return to Love, by Marianne Williamson, was one of the first books that opened my eyes to the depths that we can perceive others – and situations through the eyes of love. We emerged from love. We were created out of love. We ARE love. And our purpose is to return to love. Our world is a classroom in that journey back to fully embracing love – in all its forms – with everyone, everything, and all situations. 🔸🔸🔸 My passion is writing in the personal development and spirituality genres. I am also a copywriter and offer various writing services to businesses and personal development and spiritual communities.  My Writing Services Page Whether the Garden of Eden was real or metaphoric, it is clear that we once had a connection to unconditional love, but at some point, we lost it. Over time, Humanity's ways of dealing with others and life shifted to fear-based. We inherited fear-based concepts, ideas, perceptions, reactions, and habits from our past. These became ingrained in our DNA and developed into our current default ways of navigating the world. Many qualities encompass us feeling and showing love, and there are many qualities we express when we come from a place of fear. See my post: the Qualities of Love / the Qualities of Fear  (The links to all my related blog posts are also at the end). Fear-based ways of approaching life limit our connection to – and outward expressions of unconditional love. Coming from this constricted place, we may be reactive or emotionally distant, hurting those around us.  When hurt, our default may be that we become defensive and over-reactive, or we become protective of our hearts and shut down. Coming from a place of love we exude light.  Coming from a place of fear we exude darkness.                  The Masters came to lead us out of the "darkness" or "our sleeping state, but we were too stuck in our ways to understand or embrace their messages – at least enough for them to become the norm. It is now time for Humanity to come out of the darkness into the light: To awaken to embracing the love we are at our core and extend that love to others. Moving Beyond How Humanity Has Navigated the World Influenced by what we have been taught and shown, people are only ever doing what they think they need to do to feel good or safe, or do what they think is best, right, good, or necessary. We are all on different legs of our Journey to Peace (my 1st book😊) to coming out of the darkness and awakening to seeing [...]

Moving From “Its Not Ok” to “I’m at Peace With This” – Newsletter September 20212021-11-02T18:36:27+00:00

Journaling: A Path to Peace, Happiness, and Harmonious Relationships

2021-09-24T18:35:04+00:00

Journaling – in one form or another – has been part of our history for eons. The drawings in the caves of the ancients, the various scriptures, and historical documentations give us glimpses into our past and the diverse cultural practices of our ancestors. In more recent times, many of us journaled to document our lives and express ourselves. Today, we understand the value of journaling as a tool to help us and for self-understanding and self-healing. At this point in Humanity's evolution, we are called to embrace the Me-And-You notion. To do so, we must embrace the concepts of love: become more loving, compassionate, fairer, generous, cooperative, and accepting of ALL others. To embrace the Me-And-You notion and extend the qualities of love towards others, we must love and understand ourselves. Self-understanding Leads to Self-healing  Because of Humanity's past, we all come from a place of woundedness. And we have not learned to unconditionally love ourselves – and others. Our woundedness causes us to be sensitive, easily get hurt feelings, and needy for love. And it is our woundedness that causes us to act in ways that hurt or disappoint others. We feel and react from our woundedness – rather than respond to what is currently happening. Inappropriate reactions cause us to further get hurt feelings, create more upsets in our lives and with others, become dysfunctional – or even addictive, and cause discord in our relationships Our woundedness comes from our inheritance of the attitudes and behaviors our ancestors had to adopt to survive, birthing a Me-Versus-You way of navigating the world. As well as my spiritual/personal development writing, I am also a Copywriter. See My Writing Services My writing is based on My Books, Your Journey to Peace …, and Why We Are the Way We Are The repercussions of the negative, hurtful, and divisive attitudes and behaviors of the me-versus-you concept became entrenched in our DNA throughout the centuries until it became our default. Society's default way of navigating the world has mainly been through the negative and divisive attitudes and behaviors of fear, greed, judgment, biases, competition, and suspicion of others – especially those different from us. Negative and divisive attitudes and behaviors constrict our being. The connection to our power base weakens. We become disempowered. When disempowered, we look to feel empowered from outside of ourselves. We then become stuck in a vicious cycle of attempting to feel empowered through disempowering, constricting methods, further weakening our power base. Getting angry and lashing out; being critical, judgmental, or defensive; resorting to blaming or trying to control others, and being passive-aggressive are all tactics that come from feeling disempowered. Rather than give us what we want, these ways of countering further constrict our being. Woundedness Passes on from Generation to Generation Those supposed to love and protect us have been wounded by those supposed to love them. They may have hurt us or been emotionally distant, leaving us with a scarred heart and confused emotions. Many of us developed protective/defensive mechanisms to [...]

Journaling: A Path to Peace, Happiness, and Harmonious Relationships2021-09-24T18:35:04+00:00

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