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Unconscious Influences

The Qualities of Love / the Qualities of Fear

2022-02-15T05:03:25+00:00

All thoughts, attitudes, and actions stem from either love or from fear. What we are feeling and how we are being has its basis either in love, or in fear. All unease and negative outward expressions are based on some sort of fear. From the highest perspective there is only love! Everything else stems from fear.  The underlying fears within us surface - one way or another - in the many negative or unproductive ways we deal with life. This concept is so hard to hear and even harder to believe. Our mind just cannot wrap itself around the idea that “I am angry because of a fear.” Of course, we think NO WAY! I am angry because he/she said/did this to me. However, if we peel back the layers of why we are angry, it boils down to some type of fear. (My Worksheet: Connecting the Dots can help us link what we are feeling or what is causing unwanted reactions - to a fear we may not be aware of.  A printout copy is available from my book). This blog article is based on concepts in my books:   About My Books   Why We Are the Way We Are; Your Journey to Peace ...   About My Books (You will also find information on this link for my 2 upcoming books: 1) Overcome Your Unconscious Influences, like Anger, Frustration, Hurt Feelings, and Blaming Others for Your Unhappiness"  - due out early 2022."Relationship Intelligence ... " due out Spring 2022. To stay updated,  Sign-Up for my free monthly Newsletter ??? Our positive feelings and attitudes come from the love we feel within ourselves and from our being connected to our True Self and aligned with the love it embodies. Our negative thoughts, feelings, attitudes, and actions are based on fears amassed from the impressions and interpretations we have gathered from our life experiences now buried in our Emotional Bodies and played out through our Unconscious Influences. These fears need a voice and are usually released in dysfunctional ways as we project them out into the world. Below, Illustration 4 shows some of the aspects of love, and Illustration 5 shows some aspects of fear. Love All the joy and passion that we feel and the harmony that manifests in our lives, and all the other positive attitudes (many shown in illustration 3) stem from love. We are able to bring these about because we are connected to the spark that we emanated from. There is a memory of that spark within all of us, and it is easily accessible - as long as we have not erected roadblocks to squelch the connection. In positive, loving people, that connection can show up in either overt or covert ways, depending on their personalities. Even when the connection is stifled, as was in my case, it can still be accessed with external reminders. A baby’s smile, a spectacular sunset, the abandonment that arises in us from the exhilaration of an extreme sport, or the passion that [...]

The Qualities of Love / the Qualities of Fear2022-02-15T05:03:25+00:00

Creating Feelings of Contentment – January 2022 Newsletter Message

2022-02-03T22:34:20+00:00

Feeling contented helps us weather life's ups and downs more easily. ?Sign-up for My Newsletter - and  read my past messages at:  Sign up for My Newsletter ? I also offer a variety of writing services, see My Writing Services Page There are many ways to get to a place of feeling contented, with the most obvious one being from externals, such as ... - Getting the job, reaching a goal, or becoming successful. These give us a sense of accomplishment, bringing feelings of contentment. - Moving into a house, finding the perfect partner, or starting a family also brings feelings of contentment, however … For Most of Us, Feelings of Contentment  that Come from Outside of Ourselves Is Fleeting  ? ?  ? Contentment That Comes from Within – From the Depths of Our Being – Has More Staying Power Once the newness of what we accomplished or have gotten has worn off, we seem to need to reach for the next thing. The wanting, satisfying, and wanting again trap humans fall prey to is one of the major reasons that true and lasting contentment eludes us. ? ?  ? All my writing is based on themes from my books: Your Journey to Peace …,  and Why We Are the Way We Are, See below for info on My Upcoming Books, Overcome Your Unconscious Influences…, and Relationship Intelligence … ? ?  ? This month's message was inspired by a friend's recent question on a Facebook post – and my answer. Traci asked: "What is one good thing you are experiencing even with the times we are in?" My answer (which came to me quickly) was: "I'm feeling even more contented than usual – even though I've had some tough times lately, and I feel blessed for all those who helped me get there. And I realize that there is nothing much else that beats the feeling of being content." Since that day, I've been pondering where that sense of contentment came from. I realized that it came from a combination of: ? *Loving the Holiday Season ? **Making peace with recent disappointments ? ***Appreciating what was now good ? ****And partaking in three powerful meditations with Allison Carol Blackburn just before and between Christmas and New Year. ? ?  ? ? *Loving the Holiday Season (or any other Celebration) – is an easy one because … Embracing the Spirit of Celebrations Heightens Our Senses Allowing Contentment to Grow in Our Being ? **Making Peace with Disappointments (*or True Forgiveness as taught by A Course in Miracles. See below for a fuller explanation). I had been feeling disappointed that my extended family could not attend my usual brunch (it wasn't the numbers but more distance and the many commitments the young adults had). Slowly, as the week went on, I started to make peace with this, until suddenly, it felt ok. With the acceptance that they were all growing up and had their own lives, a huge shift occurred in me, and I realized [...]

Creating Feelings of Contentment – January 2022 Newsletter Message2022-02-03T22:34:20+00:00

Healing Ourselves Helps Heal Others, and Our Ancestral Lineages

2022-01-21T13:42:40+00:00

Individuals and Humanity are at a point where we can no longer brush things under the rug. It is our time to lift the rug – to reveal what was buried and hidden – so that we can heal anything that is not of love – and ensure that everyone feels empowered and in control of their life and destiny. As Individuals ?The impetus to look beyond our feelings, attitudes, and behaviors is upon us – so that we can heal the wounds that cause(d) bad, ineffective, inappropriate, or hurtful attitudes and behaviors. ?We are learning the importance of – and the necessity to – stand up for ourselves: for our freedoms, beliefs, and right to live life as our hearts and souls call us to. As a Collective ?We are being forced to look at the inequalities, injustices, and cruelty we have – and still do – put upon the poorer, marginalized, and disempowered individuals and groups, and … ?We are called to make restitution. ??? All my writing is based on themes from my books: Your Journey to Peace …,  and Why We Are the Way We Are, See below for info on my upcoming books, Overcome Your Unconscious Influences…, and Relationship Intelligence … As well as my spiritual/personal development writing, I also offer Writing Services see My Writing Services Page To stay updated on book releases (and to read my past messages) Sign up for My Newsletter ??? In this blog post, I will focus mainly on our individual healing. I have mentioned the healing of the collective to give a fuller understanding that this inner push to heal is part of Humanity’s current evolutionary process and that the healing of the individual and the collective goes hand in hand. Healing Our Emotional Wounds Has Far-Reaching Effects We were created to live connected to love, effortlessly tapping into joy, and naturally expressing love – and its supportive qualities like fairness, sharing, and compassion outwards into the world. See my post The Qualities of Love. However, Humanity's past caused emotional wounds within us and we  disconnected from that love. Healing our emotional wounds can be done in many ways – but they all start with acknowledgment – with looking at the conscious or Unconscious Influences that cause(d) us to feel, react, or act out of context. Acknowledging how we feel, or what we have said or done that caused us or others pain or upsets, is the 1st step to healing. Once we acknowledge we then work to remove the blocks to love - to undo the Unconscious Influences that may be keeping us from accessing the love within. To go deep enough in the healing to make impactful shifts within us, we must be brave enough to be honest with ourselves.*** There are many simple and professional ways to do this. A few that have helped me are … ?Journaling*** our thoughts, feelings, and what comes to us as we sit to write about a hurt, our feelings, or try and understand why [...]

Healing Ourselves Helps Heal Others, and Our Ancestral Lineages2022-01-21T13:42:40+00:00

Staying Calm, Keeping Balanced, Allowing for Reflection

2021-11-05T12:48:49+00:00

As we start to get back into the swing of Fall activities (at least those of us in the Northern hemisphere are), let us remember to not get so caught up in all the various commitments and/or responsibilities that come along with this time of the year that may cause us to become stressed and overly busy. And although we have missed out on many of the fun things we were used to doing, many of us have also enjoyed the slowing down –and used the time to rejuvenate our mind, body, and soul.  And if you feel bored or listless, remember how uplifting feeling relaxed and "just being" is. "Just being" offers our mind, body, and soul the energetic space to recalibrate - without us even being aware of it. And it puts us in a state where we can reflect. Modern life has often led us to ignore the reflective and feeling parts of ourselves. Our forced slowdowns this past year and a half have given us more time than usual to be calmer, more reflective, and opportunities to "just be." Links to 3 companion posts are at the end. To be happy and feel good we need to attend to our body, mind, emotions, and spiritual connection – and it is the subtler parts of ourselves that nurture these. The subtler parts of ourselves are more in tune with love – with a connection to our True Selves – to others – and everything around us. They are more based on our true reality. Being in tune with love and connected to our true reality, we navigate life adhering to love's qualities: kindness, sharing, compassion, acceptance, equality, unity, etc. We feel empowered – not in a striving for power way (based on a false strength) but from a place of inner strength (based on our true reality). This allows us to embrace the concept of me-and-you.  Humanity’s history has been based on false realities. Of separate motivations grounded in fear, greed, competition – on me-against-you. Fighting for our survival became paramount in our existence. We were reactive, rather than responsive. Although today most of us do not have to fight for our physical survival, we have maintained the competitiveness and reactive states of that survival mode. This, along with the disconnect from our True Self, has created stress and uneasiness in our beings. This has translated into the business and getting ahead ways of navigating life that has become the norm for many of us. The reactive way of navigating life that we inherited from past generations causes us to aggressively approach situations  – often bringing in past issues or being influenced by unaddressed emotions from our past – rather than responding calmly and only addressing what is currently happening. Our business, competitiveness, focus on getting ahead, and our reactive states have left no room to connect to our subtler and reflective natures – that are so important to our sense of well-being. This article/blog post is based [...]

Staying Calm, Keeping Balanced, Allowing for Reflection2021-11-05T12:48:49+00:00

Journaling: A Path to Peace, Happiness, and Harmonious Relationships

2021-09-24T18:35:04+00:00

Journaling – in one form or another – has been part of our history for eons. The drawings in the caves of the ancients, the various scriptures, and historical documentations give us glimpses into our past and the diverse cultural practices of our ancestors. In more recent times, many of us journaled to document our lives and express ourselves. Today, we understand the value of journaling as a tool to help us and for self-understanding and self-healing. At this point in Humanity's evolution, we are called to embrace the Me-And-You notion. To do so, we must embrace the concepts of love: become more loving, compassionate, fairer, generous, cooperative, and accepting of ALL others. To embrace the Me-And-You notion and extend the qualities of love towards others, we must love and understand ourselves. Self-understanding Leads to Self-healing  Because of Humanity's past, we all come from a place of woundedness. And we have not learned to unconditionally love ourselves – and others. Our woundedness causes us to be sensitive, easily get hurt feelings, and needy for love. And it is our woundedness that causes us to act in ways that hurt or disappoint others. We feel and react from our woundedness – rather than respond to what is currently happening. Inappropriate reactions cause us to further get hurt feelings, create more upsets in our lives and with others, become dysfunctional – or even addictive, and cause discord in our relationships Our woundedness comes from our inheritance of the attitudes and behaviors our ancestors had to adopt to survive, birthing a Me-Versus-You way of navigating the world. As well as my spiritual/personal development writing, I am also a Copywriter. See My Writing Services My writing is based on My Books, Your Journey to Peace …, and Why We Are the Way We Are The repercussions of the negative, hurtful, and divisive attitudes and behaviors of the me-versus-you concept became entrenched in our DNA throughout the centuries until it became our default. Society's default way of navigating the world has mainly been through the negative and divisive attitudes and behaviors of fear, greed, judgment, biases, competition, and suspicion of others – especially those different from us. Negative and divisive attitudes and behaviors constrict our being. The connection to our power base weakens. We become disempowered. When disempowered, we look to feel empowered from outside of ourselves. We then become stuck in a vicious cycle of attempting to feel empowered through disempowering, constricting methods, further weakening our power base. Getting angry and lashing out; being critical, judgmental, or defensive; resorting to blaming or trying to control others, and being passive-aggressive are all tactics that come from feeling disempowered. Rather than give us what we want, these ways of countering further constrict our being. Woundedness Passes on from Generation to Generation Those supposed to love and protect us have been wounded by those supposed to love them. They may have hurt us or been emotionally distant, leaving us with a scarred heart and confused emotions. Many of us developed protective/defensive mechanisms to [...]

Journaling: A Path to Peace, Happiness, and Harmonious Relationships2021-09-24T18:35:04+00:00

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